While googling the question “how many female comics have biological children?” (which yielded no real meaningful results but I’m also a touch lazy), I came across this article from the Boston Globe. It’s from a few years ago but still a very interesting read. It discusses how mom comedy is emerging as its own genre while many female stand-up comics adamantly do not want kids and have material that suggests as much. I support both sides.
At one point, in my early twenties, I was playing the game Life with my brother and his wife and a few other folks and they brought up my cousin Roger’s girlfriend. They were living together with no plans of marriage.
“It’s such a shame. She’s wasting her best childbearing years!” my sister-in-law lamented.
“Maybe she doesn’t want kids,” I responded.
The room fell silent. Seemed perfectly plausible to me. Not everyone wants kids. Totally cool. Who cares? I wondered if I’d somehow offended her but I didn’t understand why she assumed that the girlfriend wanted kids and I wondered how the girlfriend would feel if she heard my sister-in-law making such a statement. As of today, 2016, they are still living together with no plans of marriage and the girlfriend is in her forties. To my knowledge, they’re very happy. Someone not wanting kids isn’t a commentary on your decision to have kids. When I tried online dating for a spell, if a guy wrote in his profile “I only like tall blondes,” I knew he wouldn’t be interested in me, a barely 5’3 brunette (now redhead). People like what they like. They want what they want.
My mom, an independent woman years ahead of her time in some respects, repeatedly said “Marriage and children isn’t for everyone.” My dad, who loved – and still loves – my mom madly, has often said “Marriage doesn’t fix anything.”